Navigating the Surrogacy Journey
Sometimes it feels like there’s no map.
Starting the surrogacy journey is kind of like going to The Maldives.
Imagine you want to go to The Maldives. Maybe you’ve heard of the islands? Or maybe, at least, you’re now imagining some islands with palm trees, beautiful sandy beaches, a blue sky with a few clouds, and you’ve learned this magical land is called The Maldives.
You google “The Maldives”. But imagine Google maps don’t exist. In fact, no online maps exist. Imagine there is a Wikipedia page with information you’re not sure you can trust, and when you realize you will need to get on a plane, you find that there are no airline websites. There are just some phone numbers to call for airline companies that feel far away. And anyway, you’ve never been on an airplane. You don’t even know how to find an airplane. And you have an atlas in your house, but that atlas still has the USSR in it, so the maps in the atlas are only so so. And you have one friend who knows someone who tried to go to the Maldives once. You call that friend of a friend, and he spends a lot of time telling a story about how he couldn’t find the fish his wife wanted at the Malé fish market for their sunset ceviche.
Getting complicated? Starting surrogacy can feel like that sometimes… like starting a journey to a place that feels so far away, without a map and with only a few clues on where to start looking.
Hallelujah, Mary, LeeAnn, and Amy have a map.
WE’VE GOT A MAP!
The women at Hope have been at this work for 29+ years combined. “There isn’t a question you could ask me about this process that I can’t give you an answer to,” Mary told me once. And with their experience, they’ve built a roadmap to help get you started on your surrogacy journey.
Over the next few months, here on the blog we’ll be exploring the Surrogacy Timeline. You can check out the Timeline right here on the website, and you can ask questions about the timeline anytime (Even right now! Write your questions in the comments below or send an email to the team here.)
Check out this list to see some of the milestones you’ll cross on the journey. And click the links to find out more about each step!
Getting Started
1. Inquire and Apply – This is the very best thing you can do to get the most information possible. Email here or call the team at Hope Surrogacy. We want to hear from you! (Seriously. You can call them right now. 608-514-9150 Ask them anything. Get the info you need!) Then sign up here as a Surrogate and here for Intended Parents.
2. Consult with Hope Surrogacy – The upcoming blog post on this topic will be a doozy, but Consult Day is the launch pad into your surrogacy dreams. Spend a day with the Hope Team. Learn a ton. Make a plan.
Before the Match
3. Choose a Fertility Clinic – If you haven’t already, you’ll have to choose a team of doctors and healthcare providers to do the incredible scientific things that make this journey medically possible. There is magic. There is science. This is a choice you won’t make lightly, and Hope is here to help.
4. Psychological Evaluation – Yes. You have to be psychologically evaluated. Surrogates, Intended Parents, and (this is a surprise to some) the Surrogate’s Partner. In the upcoming blog post I’ll tell you why you don’t need to be scared, and why this was one of the best days of my family’s surrogacy journey.
From Match to Pregnancy
5. Personalized Match Meeting – THIS IS THE GOLDEN MOMENT! This is the day you will meet the people that will change your life forever. This is the day Hope Surrogacy introduces Surrogates and Intended parents. So much to talk about here. Stay tuned to the blog.
6. Medical Clearance – Surrogacy isn’t easy and there are a few medical steps to go through after the match. Once everyone is medically cleared, you can move on to the legal process.
7. Legal Contract – Once Intended Parents and Surrogates commit to taking this journey together, they sign up officially in a contract created by their lawyers. It sounds complicated. It is. But the women at Hope Surrogacy have worked with Surrogates and Intended Parents through this process hundreds of times.
8. Medical Preparation – Surrogates go through an intense medical process with their doctors to get ready for the transfer of the embryo that will grow into the baby the Intended Parent’s dream of. We’ll talk about that process, and what it takes to get ready for the transfer.
9. Transfer of Embryo – If the Match Meeting is a “Golden Day”, Transfer Day is Platinum. This is the day the embryo is transferred to the Surrogate, and if all goes well, she takes care of the baby for the duration of the pregnancy.
Pregnancy and Beyond
10. Pregnancy Determined – Did it work? Did the transferred embryo attach to the wall of the uterus? Are you pregnant? On the blog we’ll talk about what to do if all goes well and what to do if it doesn’t.
11. Baby is Born – The entire surrogacy journey is about this. Everyone on your team including the team at Hope Surrogacy, your doctors and especially surrogates and their Intended Parents – everyone is waiting for this day. We’ll talk about this day on the blog (and you can get a sneak peek at one of our IP’s delivery stories on Brent’s blog here.
There is so much more that happens during your journey, but The Surrogacy Timeline is a great place to start. With it, you’ll have an idea of where your surrogacy journey will take you. Check out the blog every week to see new stories about the Surrogacy Timeline and follow us on Facebook or Instagram where we’ll post the new stories as well.
You can also call us or contact us here any time. We can’t wait to talk to you about this amazing process and the incredible journey ahead.
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